Is it me or has everything changed?

I think its me. I returned from Alaska a week ago to find my world turned upside down. All week I've just kind of been in a sleepy daze, wondering what to do, where to go, what to say when people ask questions. It feels like I'm not ready to face society just yet, like I forgot how. Church is different, everything is big and impersonal, not like it should be. I felt very much out of place there last night. Relationships are different, Benom now has a girlfriend and feels like he needs to act like it. I don't feel like I can be myself around him with her there, she'll wonder why I say the things I do, and what I really meant by that, and if me and Benom share things that she and Benom don't. My company is different, I feel so alone. Like not relatively, genuinely alone in the literal sense. Theres not really anyone to talk to, mom and dad are so busy and so are my friends. Everyone has lives that they had before I got here and no ones stopping to make sure I'm comfortable. Not that they should, its not their responsibility, but I really feel like there is no one who understands me right now. Except for maybe Josh, he felt the same thing when he came home, he felt like everything had changed when really, he was the one who did the changing.
I know something is different in me, I have different priorities, objectives, I want different things for myself, I don't feel so superficial. I need less. I don't need to see 'my shows' every Thursday night, I don't need to go out to feel like I'm doing something. I need something else now, something big. I don't know what it is, and I don't know how to get it. I'm feeling very very lost and its extremely confusing and frustrating. The only way to get away from it is music. It's amazing what music can cure.